Woman: You need to swim as much as pos­si­ble to keep the evil away.

–River­bank State Park

Guy: Don’t they have a spe­cial sec­tion for peo­ple in jail?

–Hall­mark, 23rd Street

Over­heard by: nj

Grand­fa­ther: If you don’t lis­ten, I’m nev­er tak­ing you any­place else dan­ger­ous again.

–Belvedere Cas­tle

Guy: Yeah, I had to put my foot down. I de­cid­ed it’s not okay for my kids to play with firearms any­more.

–4 train

Suit on cell: Blood is very, very chic.

–85th & Lex­ing­ton

Over­heard by: Har­ri

Guy on cell: How should I know who’s go­ing to be there?…Why do you care who’s go­ing to be there? It’s a fu­ner­al, not a fuck­ing so­cial event.

–Union Square

Over­heard by: Cia­ran

Woman on cell: Dude, I have a sha­gadel­ic au­ra, be­cause they fucked all night when they were here. That’s why I sold them.

–Coney Is­land

Over­heard by: Se­le­nay

Suit: Man, I was up­state last week, fuck that clean air shit.

–62nd & Colum­bus

Over­heard by: Tabitha

Guy: We’re all Cannabis. We get the chance, we’ll eat each oth­er.

–Ku­do Beans, 1st Av­enue

Queer: Oh, I for­got to fuck­ing tell you. I sold my soul for $150.

–Christo­pher Street