Col­lege girl on cell: I need that like I need a dick in the ass.
Ran­dom guy: I can help with that.
Girl, to guy: I was … be­ing meta­phys­i­cal … metaphor­i­cal?
Guy: I’ll take it ei­ther way.
Girl: Yeah, sar­cas­tic … what she said [points to phone].
Guy: Well, I was be­ing se­ri­ous.

–Wash­ing­ton Square Park

Over­heard by: Lizzerd