15-year-old on cell: Why would they invade Lebanon? We’ve got nothing they want. All we’ve got are trees.

–64th & 5th

Overheard by: Caroline

Professor Obvious, on Hezbollah situation: It’s, like, so Old Testament. They really need to come up off that shit.

–Wooster & Houston

B&T mom on cell: God, honey, calm down. I’m in Manhattan, not Lebanon.

–American Girl Place, 49th & 5th

Overheard by: Courtney

Wannabe cartographer: Where’s Hezbollah…Like, it’s a city in Iran, right?

–Mug Café, E 13th St