Re­verse-Necrophil­i­ac: I hate dead peo­ple. They have such at­ti­tude.

–Time Warn­er Cen­ter

El­der­ly bath­room at­ten­dant, find­ing a used tam­pon on the floor: Who­ev­er did this, I hope she die! That shit is nasty! I hope her pooty fall out and she die!

–Madi­son Square Gar­den

Over­heard by: Leah Beirne

Hefty guy: No, I will not take pic­tures of a dead body… Not if it on­ly died for a few hours.

–Tar­get, Queens Blvd

Over­heard by: bar­bat

Co-Work­er on phone: If you do die 25 years ago, you don’t die now!–52nd & 5th

Pros­e­ly­tiz­er: Lis­ten! Lis­ten to me! You must ab­stain! Ab­sti­nence is the on­ly way! I tell you the truth–if you have sex, you will get preg­nant, you will get an STD, and you will die!–125th StOver­heard by: slight­ly in­trigued

Woman: You’re born, yad­da yad­da yadda…You learn how to type. You get clar­i­ty. And then, ya die.

–24th & 7th

Over­heard by: Den­nis

Com­pas­sion­ate man on cell: The kid died from an overdose…[laughs] But the kid died from a drug over­dose. So it’s not my fault.

–Whole Foods, Colum­bus Cir­cle