Woman to friend: It just wasn’t what they imagined when they dreamed of going to jail.

–5th Ave, Park Slope

Overheard by: MK

LA bimbette to another: I think, like, everyone I know has been arrested. I mean, like, who hasn’t been charged with a drunk and disorderly at least once?

–R train

Chick to friend: Yeah, he got a lot of gold chains, but that’s an investment… That’s bail.

–Bus, Port Authority

Guy leaving subway: Hey, baby, I’m home! One more day and I’m not in jail!

–Subway entrance, 125th St

Overheard by: Leaving Harlem

Teen thug: Man, I never had to spend Valentine’s Day with my mom… If her boyfriend wasn’t in jail she wouldn’t be bothering me.

–Eastern Pkwy Library

Chick to boyfriend: So, that’s what you learned in prison?

–Central Park