Pro­fes­sor: So, when we last left the Jews they were suf­fer­ing. But, then, we can take that for grant­ed.

–Stern Build­ing, NYU

Over­heard by: Jayso

Woman to queer: … All the Jews I’ve ever seen have had the most mar­velous penis­es.

–E 4th St & 2nd Ave

Drunk girl look­ing at Jew­ish frat boy: Wear­ing a kip­pah is like wear­ing a cage around your pe­nis.

–Frat par­ty, Co­lum­bia

Over­heard by: I nev­er go to frats bc.….

Long Is­land girl: Wait… What is Fri­day Night Lights? Is that a movie about Shab­bat?!

–LIRR