Thug: I’m a super duper human being! I’m a super duper human being! I’m a super duper human being!

–Queens-bound F train

Overheard by: sunburned like a bitch

Teen Latino thug to friend: Yo, there be some mad hot wizards up in this bitch! Or should I say, ‘wizard-ettes.’

Harry Potter screening, Loews, 34th St

Thug: … And he was there, with his cane and beard, lookin’ all Gandalf and shit.

–86th & Lex

Overheard by: Catherine

Teen thug: She is extra violent! She got UV rays!

–W 4th St platform

Overheard by: Emily B.

Thugette leaning against mail truck: Yeah, I’s the post bitch.

–Church St