Conspiracy theorist: The government knows everything these days. The goddamn E-ZPass knows when I'm going to be intimate. –Sly Fox Bar Overheard by: Cait O'Connor Dude on cell (angrily): You should not be paying that much for oil, man… No, we are not going to run out of oil anytime soon! Don't you know that there are X-ray satellites all around the Earth, and they know the location of all the oil, natural gas, and aluminum under the ground? We can do that, because we have the satellite technology! –Bronx 2 Train Elderly man seeing another with cochlear implant: Wow… now they re talking to your brain! –Time Warner Building, Columbus Circle Overheard by: michael Drunk hobo on R train: I never met a woman that wasn't a federal agent. You can't trust women. Women are like computers. Never trust a machine that can think. –R Train High school girl: You know what I just found out? Those crop circles are real! I didn't know that! And if you take an electronic device down there to video tape them, it will explode. –Wendy's