An­gry black woman: Why these moth­er­fuck­ers al­ways wear­ing “right for life” but­tons, phi­los­o­phiz­ing and shit?

–Dal­las BBQ, Brook­lyn Heights

Over­heard by: Mike H

Stu­dent: Abort­ing your ba­by is so bor­ing now. Every­one does it.

–Bard High School Ear­ly Col­lege

Drunk loud teenage Lati­na: Ladies and gen­tle­men, I am a mi­nor­i­ty and I have nev­er had an abor­tion!

–N Train

Over­heard by: g‑lime

Man on cell: Oh… Oh shit… Well, can’t you just take a wire hang­er and pull it out? Yeah, just stick the hang­er in and pull it right out! Okay? Okay. Bye.

–Stat­en Is­land Fer­ry

Over­heard by: marge

Fab­u­lous gay guy: So, my cowork­ers at Olive Gar­den all want­ed to go out for a pic­nic one day. Our one friend had to work though, so we told her to tell our boss she need­ed to go get an abor­tion and she ac­tu­al­ly did it!

–Life Cafe, Av­enue B & 10th St

Over­heard by: Rachel W.