Girl sleeping in art class: Tony the Tiger, I wish you were real. –LaGuardia Arts Thug to friend: Yo, man, Tourette's is real! They've got it on MTV and everything! –LIRR Ditzy-sounding chick on cell: Should I buy some heart-shaped sunglasses? (pause) Why not? (pause) Should I buy some sunglasses that look like real glasses to make me look smart? (pause) Shut the hell up! –St. Mark's Place Guy at party: So then I said, "it takes a real man to take a nine inch cock in the ass!" –13th St & 1st Ave Overheard by: kdub Young woman, yelling at a bus stop ad for Bret Michael's New Rock of Love: Just stop it! You're not even a real person! –42nd b/w 6th & 7th Overheard by: Couldn't agree more