10-year old son to father: I’m going to punch you in the penis!

–Hudson & Desbrosses

Woman to 4‑year-old: I do what I have to do to get things done. I’ll even break some legs.

–7th Ave, Park Slope

Girl to friend, sounding genuinely ecstatic: Yeah, he kneed me in the thigh, it was awesome.

–West Village

Woman on cell: Did you try changing its diaper? (pause) What about smacking it around a little and telling it to shut up?

–26th & 7th

Overheard by: Liz