10-year old son to fa­ther: I’m go­ing to punch you in the pe­nis!

–Hud­son & Des­bross­es

Woman to 4‑year-old: I do what I have to do to get things done. I’ll even break some legs.

–7th Ave, Park Slope

Girl to friend, sound­ing gen­uine­ly ec­sta­t­ic: Yeah, he kneed me in the thigh, it was awe­some.

–West Vil­lage

Woman on cell: Did you try chang­ing its di­a­per? (pause) What about smack­ing it around a lit­tle and telling it to shut up?

–26th & 7th

Over­heard by: Liz