Men #1 & #2: What is that?!
Man #3: Yep, yep, that’s me! Sor­ry, sor­ry! It’s me. I just don’t un­der­stand it — I’ve nev­er shit my pants in my en­tire life!
Man #4: That’s dis­gust­ing!
Man #3: Sor­ry, sor­ry.
El­e­va­tor op­er­a­tor: Wel­come to New York City.

–El­e­va­tor at W Ho­tel, Union Square