Drunk baseball fan: My friend — he’s a fat fuck! I’m gonna call him and tell him how fat he is!
–LIRR to Shea Stadium
Fat lady to tiny lady: Move your fat ass!
–Manhattan-bound 6 train
Overheard by: Dr. Seuss Tat
15-year-old fattie: If it wasn’t for my huge boobs, I would just look fat.
Overheard by: Andy
Recent high school grad: She put on a lot of weight. Doesn’t she look fat in this picture? [Friend just stares.] It’s her eyes.
Queer on cell: Well, there’s cute-chubby and hopeless-chubby… No, I’m not gonna tell you which one you are!
–88th & Amsterdam
Loud fat lady, during silence after curtain fall: Ew, that’s gross! Eat that…
–NYC Ballet, Lincoln Center
Overheard by: Evan
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