Columbia student on cell: Man, I need Spring Break so bad. I need it more than I needed to mess around with that suicidal chick last weekend.

–W 114^th St

Overheard by: arthur digby sellars

Middle-aged lady on cell: Well, does Mom know about this? … That’s not a suicide pact, Dad, it’s a murder-suicide.

–Smith & Baltic, Brooklyn

Old suburban lady: Well, maybe I should try killing myself for once!

–Port Authority

Overheard by: Ian

Teen to friend, enthusiastically: Let’s hold hands and skip and tell him to go kill himself!

–Henderson Ave, Staten Island

Overheard by: Green Star

Old guy: Guy is holding up traffic for five hours because he wants to jump off the George Washington Bridge. You wanna kill yourself, take a bottle of pills!

–Chiropracter’s office

Overheard by: sara n.