Girl wield­ing pen: Some­times I want to write on your face.
Guy: That’s okay. Some­times I want to cum on your face.
Girl: Yeah, I know you do. I saw your porn col­lec­tion.
Guy: So sue me. But look, I’m not talk­ing about cov­er­ing your face in jizz. Just a lit­tle on the side.
Girl: A lit­tle on the side?
Guy: Like on your cheek or the cor­ner of your mouth.
Girl: I don’t think so.
Guy: You should. It’s on­ly po­lite. Es­pe­cial­ly if you like me. It’s like the new swal­low­ing.

–Fish Bar, East Vil­lage

Over­heard by: John-John