Guy to buddy: It’s not cheating if it’s underground.
–Prince & Elizabeth
Overheard by: emilia
Man on cell: Yes, darling… I miss you, too… Can’t wait to wrap myself around you again… You are so hot… Oooh, yeah, you make me crazy… Hold on a sec, I’ve got a call coming in [looks at phone]… Shit! It’s my wife. Lemme call ya right back.
–JetBlue terminal, JFK
Overheard by: Big Larry
Crazy guy to train: Does anyone know how I can convince my wife that I won’t cheat on her?
Overheard by: tko
20-something on cell: I genuinely think we’d be a good match, except for the whole being married and cheating on his wife thing.
–49th & Rockefeller Plaza
Hispanic girl: You should send him a card that says, ‘Congratulations on marrying the girl you cheated on and dumped for me and then got back together when I dumped yo’ cheatin’ ass for someone way better.’