Pro­fes­sor: I’m gonna show you a lit­tle old in­ser­tion trick that my grand­moth­er taught me. It works great.

–Co­lum­bia Uni­ver­si­ty

Over­heard by: wba2101

Pro­fes­sor: Every­one is here ex­cept the per­son who is not here.

–City Col­lege

Over­heard by: ClaR­i­ty

Latin pro­fes­sor: So, what Tibul­lus is try­ing to say is that old women have to be in the beau­ty par­lor a lot! Beau­ty does­n’t come as eas­i­ly as when you’re 18 and al­ways look­ing great… Well, I sup­pose that’s not ex­act­ly true. As I look around the room, I see that some­times you girls could use some work in the morn­ings.

–Ford­ham Uni­ver­si­ty, Lin­coln Cen­ter

Over­heard by: Kate Melvin

Pro­fes­sor: My wife has many male friends… I don’t ask ques­tions.

–NYU

Law pro­fes­sor: It’s pos­si­ble… Just like it’s pos­si­ble I’ll get rap­tured at any minute.

–NYU Law School