20-ish chick on cell: But how can I be get­ting old? I just gave some­one an over-the-pants hand­job at a bar last night!

–Morn­ing­side Heights

Over­heard by: La­dle

Bim­bette on cell: … So I got down­stairs and re­al­ized I was­n’t wear­ing pants!

–Barnard Col­lege

Over­heard by: yeah hap­pens all the time

Old la­dy to teen boy: … And so you wear girl pants?!

–10th & 5th

Over­heard by: Steph

20-ish chick to dad: I don’t have Alzheimer’s — I just wear the pants.

–Schu­bert Al­ley

Over­heard by: Ker­ry

Loud high school girl: She stood at the sub­way and was like, ‘Could I have two dol­lars for a metro card?’ And that’s how she bought a new pair of pants. She told [our teacher] that’s how she bought a new pair of pants, but I’m pret­ty sure it was for bud. She said it was for pants… But it was for bud.

–Man­hat­tan-bound R train

Over­heard by: Mag­gie

Well-dressed old la­dy: He wants to go some­where, too — in­to your pants! Okay, that was child­ish.

–Co­lum­bia Uni­ver­si­ty

Over­heard by: La­dle