Con­duc­tor: Could the loud and row­dy pas­sen­gers please calm down? We ask that pas­sen­gers on the train re­spect the oth­er rid­ers.
Sailor #1: Fuck you! Fuck you! I don’t give a fuck what you say. I do what­ev­er I want.
Sailor #2: Wait, what if he gets mad and, like, drops us off in a dif­fer­ent state?!

–6 train