Eng­lish teacher: Class, I’d like you to re­mem­ber where the line is. It is al­ways mov­ing, and it is de­ter­mined by me.

–Bronx Sci­ence

Over­heard by: HJWC

Eng­lish teacher: I rose up in­to the air and flew out the win­dow… You did­n’t no­tice this?

–Hunter Col­lege High

Over­heard by: stu­pid eng­lish stu­dent

Old teacher: Okay, there are three rules in this class­room, and I am com­plete­ly se­ri­ous. Num­ber one, no swear­ing. Num­ber two, no scuf­fles. Num­ber three, no sex un­til 3:20 when you can do what you want.

–Grace Church School

Teacher: I’m a huge fan of bath­room stall graf­fi­ti! My fa­vorite from this school is in the third floor bath­room: ‘If you can read this, you are poop­ing.’

–Bard High School Ear­ly Col­lege

Teacher to an­oth­er: You are a he­m­or­rhoid in my ass.

–Brook­lyn Tech

Over­heard by: Julie

Health teacher: Drug abuse is a symp­tom of sui­cide.

–Hunter Col­lege High

Eng­lish teacher: The next scene is about sex, so pay at­ten­tion. You might learn some­thing.

–Brook­lyn Tech

Over­heard by: Julie