Hobo: I’m homeless! I’m battling child abuse! The Jews and the Irish are spreading lies about me!

–14th Street between 5th & Union Square

Overheard by: a Jewish-Irish girl 

Hobo: Nice chickie, hot, another one, good, love them, there’s a good one. No, wait: that’s a guy. 

–29th & Madison

Bald hobo: If I was tall they’d braid my hair! But no, I’m short, so they won’t braid my hair!

–Grand Central

Overheard by: Jeremy 

Hobo: I’m technologically impaired. Spare a cell phone? An iPod?

–St. Mark’s & 1st Ave

Overheard by: Rose Yndigoyen