Loud man in motorcycle jacket to table of friends: I wear a wedding band on job interviews… Makes them think that I’m committed and responsible.
Chick: That’s a good idea!
Loud man: I also wear it to the club, chicks dig a guy who can commit.
Chick: That’s so true! But wait… You’re not married?
Loud man: Nah, I just live with my baby’s mama… We sleep in the same bed but nothing ever happens.

–Tony’s Pier, City Island

Overheard by: Fulana Pepa