Guy on cell: You start dat­ing mar­ried women, you end up meet­ing their hus­bands.

–49th & 6th

Man on cell (guilt­less and dis­in­ter­est­ed): She said I cheat­ed, duh-duh-duh-duh.

–Church St & Bar­clay

Over­heard by: Robert J. An­der­son

Fe­male suit on cell: He cheat­ed on me on my 30th birth­day in Nan­tuck­et and I called my mom to tell her and she said, “Are you ready to give up that lifestyle? He’s wealthy and he’s gor­geous. I don’t want to hear it.” But I want some­one to be über-at­tract­ed to me.

–19th & 8th

Over­heard by: Se­bas­t­ian White

Dude on cell: Hel­lo? (pause) I told you nev­er to call me on this num­ber. (pause) Be­cause I don’t want my wife to find out that we’re dat­ing.

–6th Ave & 17th St

Psue­do-gans­ta to friend: Yo, I would cheat on my wife ex­cept then you got­ta buy them flow­ers and choco­late and shit. I’d rather spend mon­ey on my wife and be hap­py at home.

–N Train

Girl on cell, do­ing laun­dry: Yeah…and then he says that he has a girl­friend and he does­n’t cheat on her…so I said, “Re­al­ly? Then what was your pe­nis just do­ing in my mouth?”

–Laun­dro­mat, 9th Ave & 53rd St

Over­heard by: tiny­foo