Hot girl: Every time I look in the mirror, I cry a little bit inside.
Hot girl’s friend: Why? But you’re like so pretty.
Hot girl: For all the ugly people out there who must feel so unsatisfied with themselves and their nonexistent sex lives when they look at me and think, “wow if only I had such assets. If only my butt jiggled like that.“
Hot girl’s friend: What is with you and your obsession with anal intercourse? You can have a perfectly balanced sex life and not engage in anal sex.
Hot girl: Not if you’re Italian.
Hot girl’s friend: Ohhh, so that’s why Italians have such nice asses. All that thrusting must widen the butt cheeks tremendously.

–64th & 1st