Girl to guy: And then he cheat­ed on me with his male and fe­male cousin.

–9th & 21st, Chelsea

Guy on phone: You should tell him next time he should keep his dick in his sis­ter.

–72nd & Cen­tral Park West

Gui­do, get­ting his hair cut, in a thick Stat­en Is­land ac­cent: Show me where it says in the Holy Bible that you can’t bang your step­sis­ter.

–Stat­en Is­land Bar­ber Shop

Over­heard by: Snews­boy

Dude on cell: Bitch, I don’t care how much you give me, your ass just ain’t worth it. (pause) Plus, I can just get it for free from my sis­ter.

–Cof­fee Shop, Hel­l’s Kitchen

Over­heard by: re­al­ly hope he did­n’t mean what i thought…

Girl to moth­er, af­ter game: I’d rather go down on my sis­ter than take the d train to Times Square right now.

–Old Yan­kee Sta­di­um

Over­heard by: datura0001