NYU guy on cell: Hey dude, I just want­ed you to know that I left my bur­ri­to in your fridge. Yeah, I’ll come around next Tues­day to pick it up.

–South Street Sea­port

Over­heard by: Juli­um

Ro­tund old woman at les­bian hip­ster cafe: Give me a sesame bagel, pound it down till it’s flat, then toast it till it has a nice rich brown coat­ing. And please, a cof­fee with cream. Make it a nice tan col­or.

–Par­adise Cafe, 8th & 17th

Over­heard by: Se­bas­t­ian White

Mid­dle aged dad, yelling while cross­ing street with sons: I will learn to make Pad Thai!

–Union Square

Girl on phone: But se­ri­ous­ly, you give me good food, and there’s a pret­ty good chance I’ll have a thing for you.

–Union Square Park

Over­heard by: mol­ly

Man: You know, when I was 25 all I thought about was spend­ing the night at the Play­boy man­sion. And now I’m 35, and all I re­al­ly want to do is eat bar­be­cue.

–Hill Coun­try BBQ

Over­heard by: I’m just here for the ribs.