Conductor: This is Beverly Road, the next stop will be Beverly Road. Stand clear of the doors.

–Q Train

Overheard by: Robert

Conductor: This is the last stop on this train, everyone needs to exit the train. (all passengers go out) My bad, this is not the last stop on this train, everyone get back on the train.

–6 Train

Conductor, as train approaches 42nd Street: This is 34th Street, transfer is available to the a and e trains, connection available to Amtrak, New Jersey Transit, and Long Island Railroad. Next stop, 34th Street, Penn Station.

–Uptown C Train

Overheard by: Dara

Conductor: This is Franklin Avenue, the next stop is…I don’t know what the next stop is.

–4 Train

Conductor of crowded train: Please do not step onto the train, it is too crowded. There is another 1 train right behind us. Please wait for that one. (doors close) Ladies and gentlemen, there is no 1 train behind us.

–1 train