Girl #1, hold­ing bot­tle of wa­ter: Do you think this wa­ter is bad?
Girl #2: How long have you had it for?
Girl #1: I don’t know, I found it in my freez­er.
Girl #2: No, it’s prob­a­bly good, freez­ing things keep them fresh.

–9th St & Ave A

Head­line by: Nick Pol­lot­ta

Run­ners-Up:
· “.… Ac­cord­ing to the Jef­frey Dah­mer Cook­book” — the amoe­ba
· “As I Learned at Grave-Dig­ging Camp” — Muse on the Loose
· “But Just to Be Safe, I Would Boil It” — Max Mil­lion
· “Every Night I Put My Pussy on Ice” — Dick­inthe­Han­dis­WorthT­woBush­es
· “Just Ask Walt Dis­ney’s Head” — Pe­terG
· “Just Look What It Does for Nip­ples!” — Nick Pol­lot­ta
· “Wa­ter, Sperm, Hu­man Hearts…” — loves fresh sperm, per­son­al­ly

Click here to see the new Head­line Con­test