Les­bian #1: Oh my god, you so don’t even have any Re­pub­li­can friends!
Les­bian #2: Yes I do…what about John?
Les­bian #1: He’s not your friend. He just flirts with you on Gchat.
Les­bian #2: Oh my god, he so does­n’t. He’s had a girl­friend for three years. (pause) Plus, he’s gay.

–East Vil­lage