Pro­fes­sor in stuffy room: Some­one open a win­dow.
Stu­dent: We’re on the fifth floor; they don’t open.
Pro­fes­sor: I don’t un­der­stand why they don’t un­lock them. No one is go­ing to kill them­selves. We’re not NYU.

–Co­lum­bia Uni­ver­si­ty