Kinder­garten-age boy, get­ting off of el­e­va­tor: Last night I had a dream, and it was so scary, when I woke up I could­n’t talk.
Har­ried dad, get­ting in­to el­e­va­tor, mut­ter­ing: Wel­come to my fuck­ing life, kid.

–Co­lum­bia School

Over­heard by: Tell me about it