Teen to friends: I want to get a haircut, but every time I get a haircut I get arrested.
Cashier: This line is closed! Unless one of y'all wants to drive me to my hair appointment!
Woman to friend: Why can't he have a normal man haircut? Like, with short sides?
–Dekalb Ave & Oxford
Overheard by: Daniel Boris Dzula
Manic lady to no one in particular: Pay homage to my hair!
Drunk hipster: Donald Trump's hair is the Blarney Stone of New York.
Overheard by: Concerned Irishman