Girl to friend: She has a Shake­speare quote tat­tooed on her body, so she must be smart.

–Bleeck­er St

Over­heard by: Lyssa

Mid­dle aged dude to an­oth­er: That fuck­en bitch, man. I wish I had her on a t‑shirt in­stead of on my chest and back.

–Prince & Lafayette

Slight­ly ghet­to white girl on cell: What hap­pens when a bug bites you on your tat­too?

–D Train

Over­heard by: 4‑dumb

Tourist grand­moth­er to eight-year-old grand­daugh­ter: Do, do you like mom­my’s new neck tat­too? (pause) Yeah, me nei­ther.

–Times Square

Over­heard by: Jas