Gui­do to chef: Ew, that looks like raw fish! It looks like salmon! Is that fish?
Japan­ese chef, cheer­ful­ly: It’s chick­en!
Gui­do: It looks like shit! I thought it was fish!

–Japan­ese Food Stand, Food Court, Stat­en Is­land Mall

Over­heard by: Ashamed to be Ital­ian…