Girl to boyfriend: Two years ago I saw your pe­nis un­der a bright blue light. And it was small.

–Penn Sta­tion

Black guy to black friend: Her fa­ther does not want his daugh­ter mar­ry­ing some­one from an­oth­er race. What, is he scared that the kid will come out black and have a big nose? I’ll tell you one thing–he’ll have a big dick.

–Bow­ery & 1st St

Over­heard by: Zach B

Man to girl be­side him: Mine is­n’t that big. But it’s big enough for what I need it for.

–6th Ave & 9th St

Girl to friend: He had a big pe­nis. It scared me.

–Hunter Col­lege

Over­heard by: s0uthard

Young teenage boy to an­oth­er: You’re telling me you have an 8.5 inch dick and you don’t touch it?

–M21 Bus

Over­heard by: zaarah