Woman on cell: Yeah, to­day’s his wed­ding. I thought about dri­ving sev­en hours through the snow­storm to go, but then I re­al­ized that it’s his third wed­ding, he has two kids, and he’s mar­ry­ing some woman who’s preg­nant and mar­ried to some­one else, so I de­cid­ed to fuck that shit and stay in the city.

–6th Ave & Bleeck­er St

Over­heard by: of­fice pe­on

30-some­thing guy on cell: Your dad told you, your broth­er told you, I told you… Not to get mar­ried.

–Up­per West Side

Woman: We may or may not still be mar­ried. I mean, I signed the pa­pers but I don’t know if they were ever filed.

–Williams­burg

Over­heard by: Con­fab­u­la­tion Na­tion

Woman scream­ing at em­bar­rassed guy: We have to fig­ure this out! You can’t be mar­ried to two women at once!

–Cham­bers & Broad­way

Over­heard by: Jack