Girl #1 to girl #2: My friend is crazy, literally crazy, like you wouldn’t believe. But she’s got a good heart, most people who meet her turn away, but you just gotta get to know her. And she’s engaged to a gazillionaire, who’s married but getting a divorce. He lives with her in a condo he got. We useta have fun, but now that she’s preggers and I’m in debt we can’t. Oh, but I finally paid off my Balenciaga bag!
Girl #2: Didn’t you guy that bag like five years ago?

–Starbucks