Tiny boy to another, pointing at crowd exiting the subway station: Look! It’s our audience for the smackdown!

–Carroll St

Overheard by: kdice

20-something girl to another: Have you ever seen my legs? My legs will, like, choke you, forever.

–Prince St.

Overheard by: Roland McFly

Cop: I’m gonna smack somebody!

–Chinatown

Overheard by: chris k.

Angry girl: I didn’t give him a hickey, I just bit him!

–Bowery & 3rd St

Street vendor to customer: My big boy, he’ll beat you up. But he won’t try to hurt you.

–Livingston & Court St, Brooklyn

Overheard by: KP Whitey

Very persistent girl on cell: Come out with me! Get emancipated! Just doctor a video of your parents beating you and get emancipated, and I’ll adopt you, and then we can go out.

–Urban Outfitters, 72nd & Broadway

Overheard by: amalthya