Cute 20-something girl: So now he's cooking me dinner on Monday night.
Gay guy: I thought you weren't dating in 2011…
Cute 20-something girl: I'm not, I'm just getting free dinner.
Gay guy: Are you going to make out with him?
Cute 20-something girl: Maybe, but just to say “thank you…” It's not like I like him.
Gay guy: And what about Chris*?
Cute 20-something girl: I just want to sleep with him.
Gay guy: Why do you have so many men and I don't have any?
Cute 20-something girl: Oh, yeah, I forgot to tell you about Grant*! He's super cute and is cooking dinner for me on Friday!
Gay guy: You bitch!
Cute 20-something girl: I'm a heartbreaker, not a bitch.
Gay guy, sadly: Yeah, I know, because you really are one of the nicest people I know.

–Uptown 2 Train