Cheap suit on phone: Make con­ver­sa­tion? All you guys fuck­ing talk about is bow­el move­ments and the re­port­ing there­of!

–Spring St & Cleve­land Pl

Over­heard by: Neil­i­um

20-some­thing hot chick on cell: I’m talk­ing about a dog, Sean. Not a pe­nis.

–C Train

Scan­dal­ized woman to hus­band: And they just kept talk­ing about jizz!

–E Train

Woman on cell: I can’t talk about some­body be­ing sexy while you talk about my vagi­na?

–37th & 7th Ave

Over­heard by: Mon­do Man