Youngish girl to an­oth­er: Mmm-mmm, every­body got to be on this train like it’s the last train to sal­va­tion…

–Up­town 6 Train, Rush Hour

La­dy on line pick­ing up tick­ets from box of­fice: The city’s so crowd­ed to­day, and they all look like slobs.

–Merkin Con­cert Hall, W. 67th St

Over­heard by: Frank

Woman af­ter strug­gling to get on train through crowd: Get off the damn train, peo­ple! Don’t just stand there in the way, like Fiev­el from Amer­i­can Tail! Just stand­ing there star­ing like ‘oh, ah!’ get off the damn train!

–3 Train

Over­heard by: Tiger was my fa­vorite char­ac­ter

Cool-look­ing guy: Man! Dis some El­lis Is­land bull­shit up in here!

–Megabus

Con­duc­tor: Okay, folks, I know you can squeeze one more in here. (door clos­es) Thank you. (pause) Aren’t you glad you used di­al this morn­ing? Don’t you wish every­body did?

–LIRR

Over­heard by: Wom­an­spir­it