Jewish girl: I’m not a good Jew. I’m like Spock.

–35th & 6th

Overheard by: superjew

Large, loud, middle-aged woman to girlfriends: And the worst part is they found a Jewish guy to play me in the movie!

–Tompkins Square Park

Overheard by: bumblebree

20-something gentile: So what they’re saying is, “if you’re already Jewish, we can make you more Jewish.”

–Union Square

Overheard by: Not Jewish

Boyfriend to girlfriend: Babe, when you grow up in a tight knit Jewish community, you don’t notice noses.

–Angelina Cafe, Ave A & 3rd St