As­sertive six-year-old boy to his moth­er: You need to tell on peo­ple be­cause peo­ple need to be pun­ished.

–6th Ave & 16th St

Over­heard by: Don Will­mott

Tod­dler in stroller, ex­it­ing train sta­tion: I want to go to Co­lum­bia uni­ver­si­ty!

–96th St & Broad­way

Over­heard by: Josh

Lit­tle boy to fa­ther: Be­cause af­ter you se­duce some­body, the per­son you se­duced…

–30th Ave & 42nd St

Over­heard by: Jeff Stephens

Lit­tle girl to moth­er: Are we go­ing to get choco­late chip an­i­mal cook­ies? I need them, I’m so de­hy­drat­ed!

–2 Train