Six-year-old, playing video game: Whee! I’m going to commit suicide!

–B Train

Emo kid on train to another: I once tried to overdose, but my metabolism was so fast that it didn’t work correctly.

–N Train

Overheard by: Rachel

Guy on cell, in bored voice: I wanna fucking kill myself… but besides that, it’s just another lovely day in the neighborhood…

–Midtown, Madison Square Garden

Overheard by: Nina

Female NYU undergrad to another: Well, if it makes you feel any better, I tried to commit suicide too…

–University Place & 10th St

Overheard by: Don Willmott

Girl on cell: My psychologist said I’m not allowed to make suicide pacts anymore. Sorry!

–Central Park