Obese cashier lady: This soy milk supposed to make you slender?
Woman: Uh, I dunno.
Skinny cashier lady: Girl, ain’t no soy milk gonna make your fat ass slender!
Obese cashier lady: Shut your ass up.

–Gristedes, West 64th Street 

Overheard by: vegannramember

Man #1: I’m talkin’ about cup noodles, nigga.
Man #2: Them shits is good.
Man #1: They’s cheaper than mac and cheese.
Man #2: Mac and cheese went up by a dollar!
Man #1: Tell me you is playin’!

–L train

Overheard by: Mason Buck 

Cashier lady: How come this rings up as “Homo Milk”?

–K‑mart, East 8th Street

Overheard by: Tommy Raiko

Loudspeaker: Aisle 10 is now open for customers with less than a million items.

–Key Food, Astoria

Overheard by: Christa