Chick: The wait­er said I could­n’t sit on his lap. Then he said not on­ly could­n’t I sit on his lap, that the peo­ple next to us com­plained that I was sit­ting on his lap! That’s the stu­pid­est thing I ever heard in my life, that you can’t sit on some­one’s lap in a restau­rant. And to blame the peo­ple next to us, who were love­ly?

–Our Place, 3rd Av­enue