Guy #1: Okay…Wow…This one time in Madi­son I was so drunk…I was try­ing to get this soror­i­ty girl to come home with me and she said she would if I got rid of her ex-boyfriend (he was hang­ing out with us.) That’s all I re­mem­ber from that night! I woke up the next morn­ing, in bed, soak­ing wet, with a pulled groin mus­cle and scrapes all over my knees and el­bows!
Guy #2: What the fuck?
Guy #1: Yeah! I had to ask around to find out what hap­pened. Ap­par­ent­ly, I sor­ta, uh, fell in the lake in Madison–I pulled my groin mus­cle there–then I pulled my­self out and crawled home on hands and knees since I could­n’t walk.
Guy #2: What…the fuck…?

–B1 bus

Over­heard by: Justin Fores