Dude: Wait, who’s Pe­te?
Chick: Pe­te’s the guy who’s sleep­ing with John’s girl­friend.
Dude: Oh, right.

–Of­fice, 48th & 6th

Over­heard by: this guy

Guy #1: You mean the room­mate who sleeps naked on the top bunk?
Guy #2: No, that’s Bob­by. I’m talk­ing about Steve. He’s the one who farts all the time.
Guy #1: My bad.

–81st & Broad­way

Over­heard by: Dr. X