Girl #1: We did this ex­per­i­ment with Peeps in high school. Noth­ing dis­solved them. Not hy­drochlo­ric acid. High­ly con­cen­trat­ed. Not sul­fu­ric acid. High­ly con­cen­trat­ed. Not ni­tric acid. High­ly con­cen­trat­ed. Noth­ing dis­solved ex­cept the eyes.
Girl #2: So how come when I eat Peeps, my poop is­n’t pink and spark­ly?
Girl #1: Oh, there’s in­gre­di­ent break­down and bile’s in­volved, but you pret­ty much shit Peep.

–Metro-North train