Drunk Guy: That girl’s tits are huge! And it’s snow­ing!

–Ford­ham

A man on a tan­dem bi­cy­cle turns to the woman on it and says: You know, it’s re­mark­able just how much like wed­dings fu­ner­als ac­tu­al­ly are.

–Var­ick Street

Over­heard by: Sparkle Shortz